red lipstick

She stood inĀ  front of the bathroom mirror, an array of makeup in front of her. Most days she looked in that mirror and thought, Not bad for an old broad. some days she was grateful for the war paint, for it covered a multitude. Today was weird, she was stuck somewhere in between. The black dress hugged her every curve, heels in a height appropriate for work adorned her feet. the makeup was good, and the hair was rocking. Today only a few specks of grey showed reminding her she was not 20, but she was not dead either.

Looking in the mirror she kept hunting for that thing to make her sparkle today, she smiled and knew exactly what it was, red lipstick. Now to find the right shade, the one to decide if she was a goddess or if she was the wicked woman on the street corner. She had them all. picking her way through each tube she was waiting for inspiration.

Finally she found it, blood red, as if you had just severed an artery and watched it pool on the floor.The color of life, strength, power and lust. She put it on slowly, delibertly.

Looking up in the mirror at the full effect the smiled. Soft chocolate color on the eyes, a hint of pink on her cheeks, soflty smoothing away the years. But those lips… The smile that went from sweet an innocent to wicked and naughty. She caught herself biting her lip and wondering how may times through the day would someone have their own private thought about those red lips. How many men would wonder what they tasted like, or what they would look like wrapped around his cock. Or how many women would wonder if the red of her lipstick would tint the lips of her pussy as she licked it.

She knew that in life you were either someones cup of tea or not. Today she wanted to be someones Jack and coke. Better yet someones Crown on the rocks. That sweet slow burn that made you feel alive. Just one more glance in the mirror. Those red lips.. they look so much better when you smile, so she did. And with that she went off into the world. Her head held high, a sway in her hips as she walked and the slight glint of a dare in her eyes.

Advertisements

Where did she go?

Life gets in the way, the every day of it all. Trust me when i say i love my life. It is filled to the brim with goodness, but i think my sex goddess is in hibernation.

I try every day to look good. there are no sweat pants and baggy t shirts. Parfume and makeup are in attendance often. I have cute under clothes and they do not just live in the drawer. But i fear that my dirty girl fire is missing, not missing just not sparked. I have not written in some time. I watch porn on occasion and think ” that was nice” and then go back to the dishes. I haven’t read any erotica in some time. I need that sexual energy boost in the worst way. I fear that my lack of fire is killing my ability to entice my man. We are just different and i wonder if it is me. Did i just become Martha Stewart. Where is my inner porn star? Another birthday is around the corner and 48 sounds old to me for some reason. I cant keep enough color on my grey hair. Hell i ordered bifocals to go in my fishing gear for god’s sake.

I know it is all just in my head. I know that i am loved but i fear that i am not always desired. Lord knows that we have the busiest lives and that things happen but i have a hard time shaking the ever nagging fear that…..

time to breath deep and sort this shit out because i want to be wanted and if i cant get past the blockage in my own brain then there is no way he can get past it either.